the reason I am 22 at 17

Today I had a day of feeling Older than I am. a lot older. Youngbloods came on in the van while Halesha and I went to get apples, and I just felt.... old. like I had stepped back in time. and I felt so... deep in something. deep in something i've never been in before, not this far, at least.

I'll just sit, and feel like I don't belong, like tomorrow morning I'm going to leave in the car for good, to drive down farm roads and back roads and dead highways with hybernating trees and cold weather, and nothing with me but a pack of smokes and music. just me in my car, driving, driving towards the rest of my life, where I'll find it- nirvana. where I'll find my purpose, where I'll change the lives of everyone, and everything...

i hate it. it makes me feel... alone. lonely. the people like me, the ones who are on the same plane of existence, are far away.

Got a revolution!
One generation got old,
One generation got soul!
This generation got no destination at all!

trust jefferson airplane and youngbloods and pink floyd to get this feeling around.

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea,
Joy to you and me!