As i walked home from work (across the street) I looked up at the sky to the moon, and I could see the few clouds, like waves, going past it. I got the sense of diziness, and I couldn't help but let things slip away fora minute while I watched this. it was beautiful. I wish I could see this more often.

I have decided that I will become a night owl, since I'm more awake after getting home than before I go to work.

so i come home and im online listening to music as quiet as I can so I don't wake mother.i've got the cat in the lap again, the cat, of course, being finigan. I just got my first paycheck, niiiice, and I'm already thinking of what to do. OF COURSE i'm getting a webcam! hello!

after that, save for a bit, Les Paul.... maybe reverse those.... well, I can live without the guitar for a bit. webcam!!!! belleville tomorrow, woot.

I've been trying to think about things, but to no avail. I've fallen into yet another pit, but I think I can climb out better... maybe...?

if I drew a picture of myself, with him on one side watching and he on the other watching, there would be a split mark down the middle of my body, and I would be blind. thats one way I feel, other than disoriented and completely deserted.

I'm not fit for any relationship now, I'm afraid. once again i need to sort through things, and it sucks! because it means I need to take a step backwards from somethings, after I had gotten so far! even though I've already been shoved around. christ, it goes to show how well I know where I am... I don't.