Hush, little baby, don't you cry; Momma's gonna steal your lullabye...
The guy drove into the parking lot tonight
and he was driving my truck
he was driving my truck.
a few nights ago (actually, sunday, more than a few) my dad drove me back home, and while we drove back, he apologized. he said
"I'm sorry I couldn't save the truck for you Emily. But once the ownership was out of my name, I didn't have control over it anymore. I'm sorry. I wish you could have had it. I know you wanted it"
and it broke my heart.
and of course I remember how that whole thing happened. Where my brother got the truck first, and in order for him to be able to pay the insurance, it would have to be under someone elses name.
that person was Gord.
so, my dad no longer owned the truck, and technically Patrick didn't either.
and so, when my brother tried to sell this truck to me, my mother took control, and said No.
so he sold it to a man I don't know. Who is now driving my daddies truck, MY truck, around town.
and I am very bitter about it. very bitter. I glared at him when he walked into the store tonight. he didn't buy anything. but I glared nevertheless. because I was pissed off. I hoped that I at least wouldn't have to see it again, so I wouldn't be reminded. but nope. hes flaunting it. driving it around as he pleases.
its my truck, damnit. it was supposed to be mine.
Yes, I am a bitter person. it hurts seeing someone driving around in something that has such a hold on your past, something of a paradigm for your growing up, and the man is a complete stranger and without any knowledge of the meaning hes driving around in.
He'll scrap that truck in a few years. if it were mine, I could have saved it. It could have stayed home, where it belongs. with me. with the Engels. with the family that saved it and gave it a life. I could have saved it.
yeahyeah, its just a truck emily.
its my fucking life, man. would you let some strange woman wear your wedding dress, thinking its hers? would you let some stranger have your family photos on their wall?
no, you wouldn't.
as wierd and stupid as it sounds, its the exact same with this truck.
it was my truck. mine.
and he was driving my truck
he was driving my truck.
a few nights ago (actually, sunday, more than a few) my dad drove me back home, and while we drove back, he apologized. he said
"I'm sorry I couldn't save the truck for you Emily. But once the ownership was out of my name, I didn't have control over it anymore. I'm sorry. I wish you could have had it. I know you wanted it"
and it broke my heart.
and of course I remember how that whole thing happened. Where my brother got the truck first, and in order for him to be able to pay the insurance, it would have to be under someone elses name.
that person was Gord.
so, my dad no longer owned the truck, and technically Patrick didn't either.
and so, when my brother tried to sell this truck to me, my mother took control, and said No.
so he sold it to a man I don't know. Who is now driving my daddies truck, MY truck, around town.
and I am very bitter about it. very bitter. I glared at him when he walked into the store tonight. he didn't buy anything. but I glared nevertheless. because I was pissed off. I hoped that I at least wouldn't have to see it again, so I wouldn't be reminded. but nope. hes flaunting it. driving it around as he pleases.
its my truck, damnit. it was supposed to be mine.
Yes, I am a bitter person. it hurts seeing someone driving around in something that has such a hold on your past, something of a paradigm for your growing up, and the man is a complete stranger and without any knowledge of the meaning hes driving around in.
He'll scrap that truck in a few years. if it were mine, I could have saved it. It could have stayed home, where it belongs. with me. with the Engels. with the family that saved it and gave it a life. I could have saved it.
yeahyeah, its just a truck emily.
its my fucking life, man. would you let some strange woman wear your wedding dress, thinking its hers? would you let some stranger have your family photos on their wall?
no, you wouldn't.
as wierd and stupid as it sounds, its the exact same with this truck.
it was my truck. mine.
prematurely released by Norah at 12:08 AM
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