Lately, all that goes through my head when I think of you is what I'm saying when I'm telling you everything. All that I can think of is how to say it, when to say it, what to actually SAY. what would I do?
Oh, I am a foolish girl in a foolish world trying to live in a better world.... eg.

I'll think about wrapping up the gifts I baught for christmas, I look at yours... when should I drop that off? could I tell you then?...

I'm at my brothers, watching tv, zoning out... there you are! right there! with your best buddy... I'm there too, but, that doesn't matter.... would telling you change that? Would telling you everything make you think of me differently? negatively?

it doesn't matter what I do, or when I do it, i know the response already. so should I tell you?
yes- you deserve to know. I mean, it does involve you, you should know!
no- no one wants to be in an awkward situation.


oh, night time. it's snowing, again. I need to wrap things up for everyone..

you are wonderful, and its beautiful, but I'm already somebody's baby... thank you Elliott smith.

you know, it can be such a black and white situation to some stranger looking in on it all. in the movies, you always watch and think "just do it!". thats because the movie can't cover the whole life of that character. thats why books are better. but I can't read anymore - ADD, OCD, shit like that... it seems like it could be black and white, and torn down, it is.... but I'm not a black and white person. I wear all the colours of the rainbow at some point in my life, and they all mesh together to make whole new colours. nothing is black and white. especially this colourful situation.

fuck the world