This whole thing is getting way too much for me.
I'm broke. in fact, technically, I'm in debt now. I can't pay off my credit card. I can make the minimun payments alright, but I can't do anything else.
No one is biting. No one wants this room.
mom won't let me come back unless someone takes it.
and I can't stay here anymore.
I'm broke, for christs sake. What am I supposed to do?
I was going to tell my mom that I found someone, but that plan has been almost ruined. I could try and get her to just let me move back now. What so wrong with that? yes, I know, I won't be living here, why pay for it. but it's my own fault for changing my mind, I deserve nothing better than paying for a place I don't live in, at least until someone wants to take this room. that could take a while.
I don't want to be here anymore and it's killing me. and I'm killing myself at the same time over everything. the fact that everyone worked for me to get here. that I put being here up on a pedestal, that I was so happy to be going, so narrow minded and overly focussed on just getting here. and now I don't want to be here. it feel like a fool, and I just can't be here anymore.

how many other ways can I put it?
I cannot afford to live here anymore. I cannot afford to not have a job for another two weeks. even if I get one in the next couple weeks, it wouldn't not save me from not being able to pay rent. I am fucked, and I need to get back home NOW to get money back into my account.

would SOMEONE just give me a hand? or rent this room already?
god damnit...